The Wind and the Lion

Is this film title referring to someone who is desperately trying to cover the fact they just farted by telling mild fibs, perhaps blaming it on a pet or sleeping loved one, although everyone actually knows the truth? Well, that’s what I thought. I didn’t think there could be a whole film in it, so perhaps it was a documentary about the horrors of lying about farting.

Nup, I was wrong. It’s about a war in the deserts of Tangier around the turn of the century. The turn of last century. Do they still call it that or what? It’s just a confusing sentence now. It’s around 1905 anyways.

"Children! Get up from that tongue!"

It details the story of one Eden Pedecaris (Candice Bergen) taken captive with her children in 1905. This Arab dude with a really long title, Mulay Achmed Mohammed el-Raisuli the Magnificent (Sean Connery), kidnaps her and holds the US Government to ransom. Theodore Roosevelt (Brian Keith in top form) meanwhile has other plans, and before you know it, the world is descending on Tangier with their armies mobilising and nuclear bombs pointed at each other. Except they don’t have nuclear bombs, so they use swords. And guns with bayonets.

Helsinki Syndrome sets in and, before you know it, Raisuli and Pedecaris are firm friends. When she is rescued by the early Marines, he is taken captive by the Germans against the agreement drawn up by Roosevelt. Naturally, the Marines can’t take that shit from the Nazis so they throw their hat in the ring and kick 'ass' American style.

Clocking in at 114 minutes, this film is poorly balanced. The opening half is so slow and boring as to have had me nodding once or twice before giving a decent finish with lots of exploding blood packs and heads coming off riders on horseback. Still, it’s too long and dreary and even this final onslaught isn’t enough to stitch up an otherwise overlong film. Being a period piece, there’s no doubt the wish to capture as much screen time as possible is present but, as always, the story should dictate the length, not the sets.

On the subject, attention to detail is just great, with nothing anachronistic that I could see and plenty of authentic costumes and regalia of the era. Included in this flummery is Ms. Bergen’s hairdo. She spends the entire film wearing what looks like a round hat made of hair. It’s a bit silly. I mean, if you’ve been held captive in an Arab camp are you so sure you’d wear the same impractically silly hairdo every day? I wouldn’t.

Anyway, the film isn’t all that great. It tries its hardest, but falls short with a rather weak storyline, too much length and not enough content. I actually found the Teddy Roosevelt bits becoming the most interesting toward the end. Man, that guy was a cool President, even if he was a crazed weirdo. It’s watchable, but it spends too much time on introspection and politics when it should be showing merciless warriors hacking each other to bits in the arena of death.

Well, my feelings toward the Sony DVD Center are a well documented point of DVDnet lore and here they live up to their good name. While the print shows some minor film artefacts the majority of the film is deliciously clean and relatively sharp. Presented in the mammoth 2.35:1 aspect ratio with anamorphosis, there are some sensational sweeping wide shots of the surrounding cursed earth of the African desert.

The layer change is a slightly felt pause at 53:17, but it’s only a sudden emptiness in the sound between scenes that doesn’t affect the film at all. Shadows are fine for the most part, blacks are true and flesh tones are a curious mingling of Arabian and Caucasian. Sean Connery’s tones vary throughout from mid dark to mid white. The rest of the film looks great for its 34 years and it’s another triumph for the Sony people.

Sean Connery is the first Scottish sounding Arab I’ve ever heard, and while there are occasional moments where you can hear him trying on the Arab accent, it’s so sporadic as to just sound silly. Not to mention some of the cheesier dialogue he gets to say; but in this he’s not alone. Ms. Bergen has her share too. The only one silly lines don’t sound so silly from is Keith’s Roosevelt.

Sound effects have been dutifully filled in from the recycle bin of Hollywood stock effects with scads of repetitive gunfire and kerplodies. This tends to overshadow the dialogue too; a fault also belonging to the music. It’s of a very Middle Eastern influence and has been scored by Jerry Goldsmith. The sound levels will have the volume control yo-yoing throughout the film unfortunately, which is pretty disruptive overall.

For some reason the only extras we are afforded here are three trailers for unrelated films of the day. These include The Bridge on the River Kwai, one of the most decayed and crappy trailers I’ve ever witnessed on a DVD, The China Syndrome and Dr. Strangelove, which actually appears to be the two trailers for that film glued together.

For fans of Sean Connery I would say that this isn’t even among his better films. It’s an interesting story that seems to be at least based in reality and worth a look I suppose, but overall it’s a bit dreary and a bit long-winded (geddit?).

It has its moments, but it doesn’t have a great deal on offer really.